Love this Pain.

She's no good for me
I know that she's a wild flower
She's got a restlessness
A beautifulness, a thing about her
But here I am again calling her back
Letting her drive me crazy

It's like I love this pain a little too much
Love my heart all busted up
Something 'bout her, we just don't work
But I can't walk away
It's like I love this pain

It's just an on again
And off again situation
It's just striking a match
A tank of gas combination
But here I am again lighting it up
Knowing that she'll just burn me

-- Love this Pain By Lady Antebellum

I felt like this was all too fitting for the way I'm feeling right now. I tend to find song lyrics to better express myself.

My most difficult question yet is, Why do we want the ones that hurt us? or Ignore us? There's someone out there that I really like, and want to pursue a better relationship with. Right now I know he's dealing with his own sorrows, but I'm doing what I should never want to do... Heal the pain. I could see myself falling head over heals for this guy.

He told me last night that he saw the note I left for him, and it made him smile...

"Love.. It wants to heal you."

Love does want to heal you, and I want to give it.

I gave him space after I wrote that note, I wasn't avoiding him, in terms I was giving him and myself space.

"Baby, baby stay, stay right where you are, I like it this way, it's good for my heart"

I did come to terms for awhile, tried moving on, but just recently he came back around.

He's to visit me soon. I do hope he comes.

I have no idea that after three dates in terms, that I'm just so smitten with him.

So why do we want the ones that ignore us....? We'll see how I feel tomorrow evening..

Until then I'm living on Hope and Faith... and maybe Love.

Anatomy of a Workaholic.

Workaholic [wurk-uh-haw-lik] - Noun -

A person who works compulsively at the expense of other pursuits.

or

A person obsessively addicted to work.

We all complain about work, by why is it that someone who hates doing work so much, can become a workaholic, not wanting to stop work for other things?

If you google 'workaholic' things like " how to not be a workaholic" or " why being a workaholic is unhealthy"pops up on the search screen. But what is so bad about working hard?

Being a workaholic can come from a fews things, like, the high you get after getting a lot done, and getting it done right the first time. Or just pushing yourself to work hard so you don't have time to sit and think about what else is going on. Or the fact that they procrastinated far too long on a project so then now its time to do nothing but work.

Being a workaholic damages relationships with others, causes the depression, stress, high blood pressure, over-eating, and malnutrition. From what it seems, all negative effects. What if working is like a drug to you, you get a high from the completion of work, and getting a lot done?But then again, in the end, what drug is good for you? None.

There's something about juggling three jobs, and completing them all within their own deadlines that gives me statisfaction. Also the more your focused on your job the less you have time to think about things that bother you. The less time you have to think about waiting for a text message, or the less time you have to sit and worry about the next move.

There's something about work that makes you feel better, because your not thinking about the bad things in life, your focusing on the now, what needs to be done. It's amazing how numb work can make you feel. It's amazing how feeling so numb can give you the answers you want, but give it time, the answers come later, after hours of working.

Maybe being a workaholic isn't so bad, just because you're not being lazy, your working, in terms towards an answer.